I have decided that from now I am not going to jump straight into my blog. I feel whenever I do that and I look back on them that it almost comes across that I want to type it all down and then quickly duck out of the building. Completely rude I know but I hate to admit it, but it is totally me at the same time. Not in the rude case I would like to mention but I do have a tendency of starting off a blog post, saving it as the brain has gone dead before picking it up a day or two later and then publishing it.
Not to brag or anything but I seriously think my blog is somehow shaping or “involving” which how I like to see it as, someone else’s journey that they are about to take. Whether it be in University or behind a closed office door and they are staring at a blank screen, wondering what they should be doing. In better cases, my friend T, Facebooking while “borrowing” the company’s photocopier which everyone in the floor needed. Smart move I must say.
As to the non-bragging part since I first typed up my blog post which I have to admit, even though I have not meet half of these people who do read this as we live in a pretty big world, I get nervous each and every time. And with that have had over 800 views of my thirteen, now fourteen postings. So some of them have been myself looking back and checking to see if anyone has posted a comment, to which 3/4 of the time no one does which is okay, however I go back and reread from where it all started.
So with that, I am going to start a new chapter of my blog and it is going to be a different way. If you don’t like it, then that is okay with me as we all have our own opinions about certain things. Just read my blog about “For or Against Euthanasia”. We certainly had a lot of different opinions that day and to those who do like it and want to see the change being continued, then drop a hint or some cases, a word, message, link to something nursing or beauty related that will brighten up my day or better yet, continue to read this.
With that final piece of thoughts before actually starting the blog, I wish you all the best and hope you continue to have an amazing week. Auf Wiedersehen.
So before I begin and if you have just come straight home from the office and are looking at the mail that seems to be camping on your table, I suggest a few things:
1.) Take off those heels that I know have been killing your feet every minute of the day.
2.) Grab yourself something to eat, drink and possibly a hot date that will rub your shoulders and neck while you read this.3.) If you are hungry, that pizza slice which has been sitting in your fridge for the last week is not a good option in fact, back the hell away from it. And go with something healthy like a massive slice of mud cake with whipped cream and strawberries. Totally healthy right there!
4.) Grab a blanket, a throw pillow if you are going to lounge on the couch or your bed (lucky you!) and get comfortable.
5.) Continue on with reading and have a wonderful time!
So my week has not been that fulfilling in general compared to what some of my fellow people in this world are experiencing on a daily basis. With that, I have done nothing much except catching up on the amount of sleep that my body seems to be absorbing. Within its hibernating period before it goes back to University next week or browsing over the “small” amount of pre-reading that I have to do on a nightly basis for my subjects this semester. Which by the way, I am thankful it is only four as I would have gone more insane then I did last semester if I had to do five all over again.
And during that time, counting down the moments or rather the days I had to go before I could go and see what my results were for my semester grade. Stressful yet totally mind wrecking with nerve. What felt like an eternity was rather in fact a few hours that I had left on Monday. All I could think was how time had flown and if I don’t pass a certain course, then would I have to redo it next semester (semester one) as it wasn’t offered over summer schooling and listen to the voice of Bernadette. To which if you are friends with me on Facebook, would have witnessed the endless complaints I have put up about this teacher and vice versa.
And yes, the teacher is in fact still teaching and clearly I am still studying so there were no complaints put in about me bitching about her but rather got a few likes about the post.
Monday arrived like it normally does and while everyone else goes off to work, I wake up late after a fit fall night of sleep with my constant tossing and turning, I set my phone alarm to 1600 because I am a cool kid who likes it to be in 24 hour time. And I begin the dreaded waiting period. Technically I would like to call it a “cooling off period” but then I not buying a piece of investment property or a block of land.
However have made a few glances at a little shin ding not too far away from where I am living. That’s if I had millions of dollars that where stashed away somewhere like a trust fund, and my parents surprised me with it like a “Congrats, you could potentially pass Semester One at Uni. Here’s a million plus bucks! Enjoy spending! Heart Mom and Dad”.
For a second, why did I just refer that sentence in an American voice and my parents as Mom and Dad when clearly it’s Mum and Dad. Gah! I need to stop watching Americans on YouTube. And besides, what’s to blow 298,000 on a house and walk away knowing that no bank is ever going to throw or rather kick you and your kids out on the curb? A life time investment is what it is.
My Sister comes walking to into my room as I am trying to figure out enough if I am seriously interested in investing what little spare time I seem to have once Uni starts in a new show that I had to accidently stumble across. And no it is not American Horror Story again. Been there and tried that. So while talking to my Sister about hitting the town curb dressed in our trashy amazing gear with a sign that said, “Two for….” which seems popular in my little town.
In fact we were discussing where we needed to go for her classes next semester, or rather this semester which feels weird saying that by the way, as she is about to start her pre-Uni course at USQ. My phone alarm goes off which makes me squeal with excitement and being asked, “Why is your alarm set at… What is 1600?” Which earned my sister a reply of, “Its four pm in 24 hour time and it is when the results are in for my last Semester. Do you want to be here when I open it?”
So like two naughty little school girls, we log into my student user account for University at Southern Queensland which by the way was after the system crashed twice, and I quickly browsed my little tool bar on my uconnect page and spot what I am looking for. The RESULTS tab. I glance at my Sister like ‘do I seriously want to do this right now?’ before sucking in a deep breath and click on the link. And there, nestled in the web page was my result and the breath that I had been holding rushed out.
“I’m going to call Mum. She needs to come and see this.” I tell my sister as I reach for my phone and dial my house phone number. My mother, who is sitting in the next room picks up the phone and says her customary answer of, “Oh baby, what do you want me for?”
“Nothing much except for a little pat, fondle, stroke and lick my big toe.” before hearing my Mother laugh her sinister and dirty laugh which should be banned because I swear all the guys look at her and want to cream their pants. “Now in all seriousness Lois, have my results. You need to come and see them now.”
And before I know it, my Mother and Father are trooping their way into my bedroom and sure enough, the background of the lounge is in complete silence. Not even a mouse, that is if we had one, made a stir. It was completely silent. I looked at my parents with a grim look on my face and my sister blurted out, “She failed. Yeap, completely and utterly disgusted. I mean failed as in capital F.”
My Mother looked at me horrified and yelled, “Are you joking or being serious. Oh my God, are you going to have to repeat?” and I showed her the evidence of my failure:
|The Results Are In…|
Few minutes of silence on my parents behalf before my Dad declared loudly enough that the Queen could hear in England, “I need my glasses.” before scampering off to get them. Then my Mother screamed at little before clapping her hands. That night, I got awarded not my imaginary trust fund but did receive a few kisses, pats on the backs, high fives and a complete head nudge from the fam-bam.
After that, I proudly took a snap of my results before uploading it too Instagram, which has almost become my second favourite place to hang out while tagging @usqedu in the tag and onto Facebook. And have to admit, I was waiting anxiously to see if anyone would post a comment or start liking the photo. Guilty I know but hell, I am so proud of myself because after all the doubts that I had not only put on myself but also inside myself; the long and incredibly hard hours that I have put in to studying extra material to make sure I understand what something means because of my dyslexia, I have come out with a pass.
Okay so none of them are of the HD area, like some people are wanting. This entails them for those who don’t live in Queensland or Australia, a higher percentage to have multiple job offers in a hospital as getting a nursing job in such field for post year are almost nothing to 1%. Because before all this debarkle happened, most nursing students were offered two or three nursing jobs of where they could work in a hospital whether it is on the coast or in a rural town.
Now to be offered a job in a metropolitan city to do your post grad year, if you turn it down: you are crazy-cray. However I am still wrapped that I passed my first semester, I still have blood running through my veins that resembles something red and not something with black writing. And I am happy with that.
And yet what type of blog would I not be writing as we all know, I have to ask a simple question. As to HD and some students wanting them, I seriously want to know how much are they sacrificing in the private and personal life as well as their Uni life to gain these distinctions for a better job carer?
That is if they are even offered a job at the end of their three years of constant studying and I presume having no social life. I understand that nursing along with some other degrees are time consuming and cause stress in your life but then what Uni degree isn’t like that at all?
For me and the marks that I received for my first semester, I lost a large amount of work hours that I was working to make sure I could do all the study and assignments that were required. Lost some of my friends because they simply couldn’t understand how much stress I was under and ‘why I couldn’t come out and play every day’ and my somewhat healthy lifestyle I was leading.
However I almost lost my family because they were tired of the constant yo-yo behaviour I was leading and my boyfriend.
And that is when I learnt how to juggle multiple balls that were coming at me from all sorts of directions. I learnt nearing the end of my first semester, of course like all good reasons, to write down a weekly to do list that had everything that I needed to complete before the week was out. Each subject had nominated things like:
- Listen to weekly lecture. You can do it!
- Complete SDLs for tut/lab
- Is everything up to date with previous SDL?
- Attend lab.
- Listen to weekly lecture.
- Complete homework from last wk.
- Research Ottawa Charter for exam.
- Did you enjoy Lisa’s lecture?
- Complete homework for this wk.
I am sure you get the jest of it, but I had I not thought of this sooner rather later? Have to admit, spending ten minutes after an early shift on Sunday night when I wanted to do nothing else but curl up in a ball and die; writing a list and highlighting words so they stood out helped a lot. Writing little memos to myself about a particular song that I heard on the radio or a little “you go, Buddy!” not only impacted those moments where all I could think was: ‘Oh shit, not another day!’ but made it that much better.
Have to also admit that while brushing my teeth every morning before going to Uni, giving myself a pep rally talk that almost needed pom-poms at one time, made me feel like I was Jackie Chan and that I was going out there to kick some turkey neck and arse. Turkey neck? Wtf? Okay, so the image of toothpaste rolling around in my mouth along with white stuff all over my lips isn’t attractive, not at the least but hey; I am still here right?
Also I know this is going to sound harsh or in some cases down right bitchy, but I honestly think to Dear God that it is my timeto shine in my family. I am ready to knock my cousin off the University pedestal that she has been placed on and finally take my glory and cool as bitch crown with me and claim my spot. In the bright white, shining like a disco ball, amazing warm limelight that I have always wanted to be in but have always made to feel like I didn’t meet the criteria.
In fact I have already made a slogan for when I graduate and am ready to take the title and it is going to be: ‘Move over bitch, because Andy Sacks is here. That’s all.”
And I know my cousin is probably going to be reading this as she is one of my friends on my Facebook account and I know you are going to be horrified, upset and will probably tell my Uncle. But you know what, I want to be recognised and to do so, I am going to step out of your shadow that I have been living in for numerous years and I am going to shine.
Shine so bright, that your pretty little blue eyes are going to hurt from the radiance that is coming out of my skin. And you need to remember something in case you have forgotten: I am awesome. I am determined. I am a warrior Goddess. I am a scary thought riding on your coat tails. And I am my Mother’s daughter after all.
And most of all: I am ready to take my place as Queen Bitch.
Love it or Lump it sweetheart.
And in case one of my many readers are Therapists or Shrinks and may think that I need to see one of you many talented and yet secretive people; oh honey. I don’t need to see one. In fact, I don’t need to be critiqued anyway because I am 100% fabulous darling.
When the timing comes and my Sister is ready to share the limelight with me, you will have two powerful and amazing women sharing the spotlight on our comfy and plush pedestal while everyone continues to gaze at us.
Because everyone has seemed to have forgotten, that even in our brilliant white landscape of Siberia, that when the timing has come; you will hear our roar. Better hatch your windows and doors, because the snow is bitterly cold and you may need to gather some fire wood.
Until Next time,